Life never goes as planned....

Hello blogger world!!!

So from my precious posts you have found out that i was diagnosed with PCOS around the age of 20. When i was married we tried and tried and tried for a baby, right before our relationship went south, I knew my next step was clomid. Well now i am in a new relationship and Tevis knew from the beginning i wanted kids, I wanted to be a mother. We talked about kids early in our relation, so he knew what he was getting himself into. Life never goes as planned, i see 16 year olds get pregnant just by blinking, so its very frustrating to see young girls having babies. I HAVE TO KEEP THINKING, everything happens for a reason and god has other plans for me. Like right now i just keep thinking, god put me in Tevis' life to keep him alive and take care of him. I will know when the time comes if i need to prepare myself to be a mother or not to be a mother. I have my days where i talk myself into being ok with not being a mother to my own child. I feel i know in the back of my head I wont be a mom, i wont have a baby. I have my own set of issues and then Tevis has his own set. We don't have money to do in vitro or surrogate, but i cant be so negative, but at the same time i have to prepare myself somehow. It keeps me inside to think i wont be a mom, and i wont give my family a grandchild, niece or nephew. I have my lovely yearly this summer and will of course ask more questions, and maybe once tevis gets insurance we will get him checked out and see what our options are. I hate the thought Tevis and I just cant make a baby on our own. If its meant to be it will happen! Until we find out more answers I will just focus on myself, tevis, school and being the best step mommy i can be to Delaney because she deserves all my life no matter what. & if one i can make her a big sister i know she will be the best out there!  

XoXo. Hope everyone had a great Wednesday!